Wow. It has been a while.

Patricia brought it to my attention that I’ve updated pictures on Facebook, but I haven’t updated my blog. Oops. I still have no idea who reads this beside my family and really close friends. So for anyone who I haven’t talked to in person lately… How about an update?

I’m going to make this like the spark notes version; super short and sweet.

I came home for vacation for almost all of July, and per the doctor’s suggestion, I didn’t think about Kyrgyzstan. I had a great time at home relaxing and visiting with my nephew and the rest of my family.
Highlights from the “visit” stage:
-meeting my new beagle puppy: (at PetSmart buying him a new toy Dad: we need to get copper a new indestructible toy. Me: What happened to the last indestructible toy? Dad: He destroyed it.)
-traveling to VA to visit friends
-broccoli, mama’s enchiladas, and other delicious food things

Moving on…
The night before I was supposed to go back, as I was packing (I know, right! ME, packing the night before as opposed to weeks in advance? Weird) I had a major breakdown- anxiety attack, etc. After a lot and I mean A LOT of soul searching, praying, crying, thinking, and discussing; I decided not to go back to Kyrgyzstan for the time being. I called PC staff and was able to take an Interruption of Service, which means I have the option of going back later (within a year).

I haven’t decided 100% about going back, Right now; it is looking like I won’t be going back. I am currently studying for the LSAT and working on Law School application, and hopefully, I’ll get into law school next fall.

I really do understand why they call Peace Corps, “The Hardest Job You’ll Ever Love.” I survived some of the most difficult months of my life, yet; (maybe perversely) I wouldn’t trade or change them for anything.

I don’t know if I’ll keep updating this blog, or not, Maybe I will, maybe I’ll start a new one for the next part of my life adventure (even though I have no idea where that will take me) Who knows?

Jess

My Peace Corps Experience: Chapter Two

You might have been remarking that things have been quiet on the
blogging front for a while now, and you'd be right. I just haven't
really been up to it recently. Unless you've been hiding in a cave, or
haven't seen any news program in the past few weeks, you'll know that
the situation in Kyrgyzstan has been pretty tense. I'm not really
allowed to talk about it and I don't really know any more than you
would if you read the news. Basically the only additional thing I can
add to what you've read or heard is that I'm safe. Most of the
violence was restricted to the south, and the north remains peaceful.
The past few weeks have been really, really tough for all the
volunteers- almost as bad, if not worse than the two months of my
personal "dark ages." I'm handling everything better this go around,
but it is more difficult because, due to the recent violence, most of
the volunteers in the south are leaving the country and a few
volunteers from other oblasts, too. Among the volunteers that are
leaving are almost ALL of my best friends over here. Plus, K16s, who
were supposed to leave in August, are leaving now, too. I've been
blessed for so long with so many wonderful friends, and all of you
back home are so important to me, but serving in the Peace Corps with
my friends over here has been such a wonderful experience and has
allowed us to become as close within a year as I am with some of you
back home who I've known for years. There are just things that they
will understand that I couldn't ask you all to. So, saying goodbye to
them has forced me to star in an encore performance of my role as
human watering hose. Haha. I also realized, that I've never been left
before. I've moved so often, and took off for this great PC Adventure,
and left my friends and family behind. I have never known what it
feels like to be the one that gets left behind. And truthfully, it
sucks. After many discussions and intense internal battles, I've
decided not to take the PC's offer of Interruption of Service. They
offered it to all the volunteers here. Basically it is a chance to go
home early due to "circumstances beyond your control." You get to
leave without having to Early Terminate, and still get the benefits of
being a RPCV. (Returned PC Volunteer) If things change, and get more
violent, or unsafe, then of course, I'll come home. So, don't worry.
But right now, I feel safe and with the exception of saying goodbye to
people a year earlier than I had planned, I am okay. I'm not being
flippant, or not caring about my safety, I just feel like this is
still where I am meant to be. I made it this far, and as Daddy
reminded me a few months ago, God doesn't give you more than you can
handle. At the time, I thought God was overestimating my abilities,
but… I don't know, maybe it is not rational, and at times I feel that
it is against my better judgment, but I am staying. I can't explain
why really, but trust me, I'll be okay.

So, right now I'm packing to come home FOR A VISIT. I think a month at
home will give me an opportunity to clear my head and to prepare for
my last year in country. Coming over here for the first time was hard
because I: 1) didn't know anyone 2)didn't know the language 3)didn't
know the culture 4)didn't know my job 5)had never been away from home
for so long. After almost month of vacation I can come back with a lot
less trepidation than the first time. I am just going to have to make
a concentrated effort on making friends with the new group of
volunteers and strengthening friendship with people in my group that I
don't know as well. The next year, without my in-country support
network that got me through the first year, will be hard but I have
faith that I can deal with it. It'll be my Chapter Two.

For now, I'm hoping and praying that Kyrgyzstan will be peaceful and
stable and can recover from the tumultuous past few months. I know it
will take a lot of work and time, but I think it is doable.

Here's to hoping.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan (for the next 8 days)
Jess

Notes on GRE preparation:

In my ample free time the past week, I've been trying to prep for
GREs. I was so super excited to realize that I'm coming home in less
than a month, but for some reason, I didn't grasp the fact that while
I'm home I will be taking the test. Now that that fact has settled in-
I'm cracking down (as opposed to cracking up haha) and really trying
to study hard. I haven't "studied" in what? A year and a half? My
study habits are a little rusty. These are a few of the thoughts that
have crossed my mind while studying this week:

- If the GRE people have to use Henry VIII in the example sentence,
the word probably hasn't been used since he was king and therefore, I
don't need to know it.
- One should take care when listening to music while studying
otherwise; the lyrics to James Taylor's Sweet Baby James might
suddenly show up in your notebook under the definition of
"mountebank." Sigh.
- If I could spell, I could get through the vocabulary section much
quicker: having to double check the spelling of the word AND half the
words in the definition really slows down the process.
- It is really helpful to learn the vocabulary words, but when you
have to find the antonym of the vocabulary word and don't know the
meaning of the multiple choice options… all the prep in the world and
I would still revert to the old standby- always guess "C" haha
- Who knew that fourth grade math would come back to haunt me while
I'm applying for graduate school. Seriously, when will ever I need to
divide fractions? And if I'm never going to need to divide fractions,
why to I need to prove that I can do it? Same goes with finding the
area of a circle or half of an equilateral triangle. Sigh.
- If you're writing definitions and forget all about the cup of coffee
next to you, it will eventually turn into a passable substitution for
iced coffee. Minus the ice.

miss you
love from Kyrgyzstan,
jess

p.s. I think I have bedbugs.

Today was awesome.

I know, I know… Another blog? Only, I just had a fantastic day and had
to share it! I can type faster than I can write, so I figured I'd just
blog about it instead of writing it in my journal and then you all can
know about it, too. Today was ""TYLYY." It is sort of a farming
holiday, the best way I understand it. The community gathers and
socializes and prays for rain and good crops. And then have basically
what amounts to a water fight. I got ready with my host family this
morning; it was a beautiful morning, sunny, with a few clouds. We
gathered up dishes, salad making stuff, of course, tea and cookies and
candy, blochkie that we spent hours making yesterday, tushuks, and Apa
made us all pack a change of clothes. She also made me wear a cap. We
all know that my head is too big to pull off a cap, but she knows I
have one, so she made me wear it. My three younger sisters and I
carried stuff to a close neighbors' house where we added all of our
stuff with a few other families in the trailer that is pulled by our
tractor. The kids (and I) rode in the back of the tractor out to the
field behind our village by the pond. A bunch of other families came
and we all set up in a huge line of tushuks, picnic style. The young
women, and kalens started preparing the tables while the old women and
the men sat around and talked. My sisters made it about ten minutes
before a group of boys doused them in water. Lacking water guns or
balloons, bottles make really good splashers. My "eje" status kept the
boys at bay, that plus I was cutting up vegetables for salad near a
group of women who'd have flipped if they got wet. The tables were set
up in groups by streets in our village. I've been picnicking a bunch
with my teaching staff and my family and extended family, but this was
new to me because there were some of my neighbors I don't know that
well, and it helped me figure out which of my students live near each
other. At the far end of the row, they were manning the "kazans,"
three HUGE cauldron type pans that were cooking meat for the besh
barmak. They killed a cow and a sheep and had the meat boiling for
hours. I was super really pleased they decided to do rice besh barmak
instead of noodles because the rice is cooked separate so it doesn't
taste like animal, whereas the noodles are cooked in the broth. We
finished making the salads, and the men erected a sun shelter from the
side of our tractor and we drank tea and ate salads. I took my camera
and decided to take pictures, and my Ata asked me to take pictures of
all the groups… the meat. Haha I took one picture of the three kazans,
and then he came up and made me stand near them and hold the stirrer
thing and take a picture. I was not excited. Boiling meat isn't
exactly my favorite thing. Then, I proceeded to take pictures of the
different groups. Let me explain this process. I usually knew a few
people in every group, either from school, or extended family, so I
would talk to them, make sure it was okay to take a picture, and then
snap it. If that were all, my day would have been so much easier.
Haha. At every single group, I had to "chai eech," salat je," and "nan
oosti." Drink tea, eat salad, and taste bread. I lost count of the
different types of salad I tried, and the different types of jam, and
after about the forty-seventh cup of tea, I quit counting. I made the
rounds of most of the groups before I felt seriously ill. I was SO
uncomfortably full, so I went back to our table with my family and
neighbors and sat while other people came to visit us. Between the
conversations I had with the other groups and the people at our table,
I can basically sum up the majority of the conversations with the
people I'm not close to with five sentences (loosely translated) "You
speak Kyrgyz really well," "Are you married?" "why not?," "when are
you getting married?," "Don't you want to marry my (son, nephew,
grandson, brother) and come be our kalen?" haha I was able to have
real conversations with my family and neighbors. They are all really
excited about my going to America, and my summer plans. After a while,
they announced the meat was ready, so all the groups took buckets up
and got the broth "shorpo" and passed it around. They all know me so
well now that they don't even give me a cup. Haha Then, they brought
the meat and rice. One of my favorite moments was when Apa said to
another eje, "she's my daughter and I know how much she eats and how
much to give her." This was because the eje was telling my Apa to give
me a ton of rice, and Apa knew I wouldn't eat it. I had thus far
avoided being splashed by water by my eje status and the fact that I
told the groups of boys that followed me with mischievous grins and
bottles of water not to splash me because I was holding my camera. I
made the mistake of walking away from the ejes, and not carrying my
camera after we finished eating to stretch my legs. I got splashed by
one facetious little boy and it was all downhill from there haha. The
line had been crossed and within about five minutes I was wet. They
all got yelled at, "that's enough," "don't spash your eje," "don't be
ooyat (shameful)," to no avail. The splashing stopped long enough to
be respectful while everyone did the final "omen" (kinda like an
"amen" after the prayer) and the power of half our village praying to
god for rain was astounding because no less than two minutes after the
omen, the skies opened up and rain started pouring. Most everything
had already been packed up, and between the rain, and the kids
splashing water, and adults splashing water, we got pretty wet before
everything was packed up to go. My sisters and two cousins and I
climbed back into the back of the tractor for the ride home and got
completely waterlogged and hailed on for a few minutes. We got home
and all stood dripping for a few minutes. Apa asked my why I wasn't
changing out of my wet clothes faster, I'd get sick, and then she
laughed when I told her I couldn't because the key to my room just
happened to be at the bottom of my bag under my soaked change of
clothes that I never changed into, a bag of meat, a bag of borsok,
azeez's clothes and a ton of other stuff. After getting my key, drying
off, and changing clothes, you'll never guess what we did. That's
right. We drank MORE tea. I'm sitting in bed typing this and I'm going
to climb under the covers and get good and warm before doing anything
else.

I'll try to post pictures soon.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

a few more pics

Силер кап кара кетсенер

Literally, (if it was spelled right – I can't find the "ng" key) the
title of this blog means "you all very black went." In translation it
sort of means, "you got really dark." In Issyk-kul, they use the
informal plural for the formal singular. It took me a while to get
used to being called by the plural. My sisters said this to me today
after our outing in the city. My arms and face got tanner, but my
shoulders are "кып кызыл," or "very red." I feel like my summer so far
has been"sunburn by number." I wore a T-shirt and got a farmer's tan
sun burn. Capris gave me a below the knee sunburn. A tank top and
cardigan = my chest got sunburned. A spaghetti strap tank top doing
laundry = only my back got burned. Today I wore a tank top and vest
and my shoulders are really really burned. Eventually, I'll be tan all
over. Hopefully, I'll learn my sun block lesson before I get skin
cancer. Sheesh. I had a fantastic day in the city with my sisters.
Aiculu, Kaciet, Aidana, Nurzada, and Nurzada's friend Zumrad all went.
I had to help the American Corner for a bit at a program by the
university, so we went and played Frisbee for about an hour or so.
Then we went to the park. On holidays the park turns into a carnival,
with rides, and vendors, etc. The girls ate ice cream, kettle corn,
cotton candy, and roasted nuts, and, of course, I had to "oosti"
(taste) everything. The girls wanted to ride a few rides that you
couldn't have paid me to get on. I love roller coasters and rides, but
none of the ones here have any kind of safety restraint, so I must
admit I was quite relived when the girls decided they didn't want to
wait in the long lines. We got Azeez a toy. A water gun. Bright idea,
right? Giving a water gun to an already semi-obnoxious four year old…
he enjoyed it for the four hours he had it before he broke it, haha.
We took a picture with the snake and peacock picture people. I was
surprised. None of the girls were afraid of the snake, not even Aiculu
and she's only eight. Nurzada was the only one who wouldn't touch it.
Not because she was scared, but because it was "gross." Haha. The
younger girls wanted to go to the zoo, but the two older girls thought
they were too cool to go, so I put democracy to the test and we had a
vote, so we went to the zoo. I agreed to let Nurzada and Zumrad wait
outside as long as they promised not to go anywhere and to be safe and
all that jazz and I gave them my second cell phone so they could call
me in case of emergencies. I'm responsible. Haha Aiculu hadn't been to
the zoo since she was a toddler, so she had a blast. Kaciet really
enjoyed it, too because there were new animals. Aidana's feet were too
tired to really enjoy it, I think. She didn't wear comfortable walking
shoes. We finished with the zoo and went to lunch. I took them to the
"Pizza House" restaurant in Karakol. It is super expensive (for my
salary) and we could've eaten lagman or ashlianfu or something
cheaper, but we can eat that at home, and I wanted it to be fun. So we
had pizza. My shoulders were super sunburned by this time, but hadn't
started to hurt yet, so as we chatted waiting for pizza, they marveled
over how red my skin got and how hot. They think it is so weird that I
want to get color. I think they like it when I'm super white. We
walked to the center, and had a good chat. The girls don't really talk
at home when Ata is here because he is irritating and wants to turn
everything into a lesson. The feeling of a child holding your hand to
cross the road or to walk with you is such a great feeling. It's like
they grab your hand and your heart at the same time. Everyone should
be around little kids. It is really good for the soul. We eventually
got a taxi back to the village, but the driver wasn't a regular
driver. It turns out that he was the driver that took Apa and I home
the very first time I came to site. I should have known. He was a
scumbag then, too. He charged us more than he should have then, too.
But anyways, we got home okay. The girls all had a great day, and so
did I.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan (for the next four weeks)
Jess

I milked a cow

It has been a very eventful day. It started off pretty slow. I woke up
at a quarter of six, finally dragged myself out of bed at 8ish, had my
coffee and then read til about noon. Apa called to me and asked if I
was free, which I was, so I helped her make bloshki (twisted bread
rolls) for a few hours, then taught Aidana a new crochet stitch.
Nargiza, (another teacher who also happens to be my director's
daughter and our neighbour) came over. I showed her how to crochet a
few months ago, and she wanted my help to learn a new stitch, too.
This afternoon, I went with Aiculu and Aidana to fetch the cows. In
the winter they stay at home, but the rest of the year, the shepherds
and cowboys take them to the fields for the day. We go to get them to
make sure they come straight home. (it makes the phrase "til the cows
come home" quite literal) We put them in the pen and I helped milk
them! It was so weird! And way, way harder than it looks. My host
sisters and I had a couple of great laughs. Our black cow nearly peed
on us all, and our white cow kicked the bucket and managed to get her
hoof stuck on the rim of the bucket. We fed the calf milk, and Azeez
has to be where everyone else is, so he succeeded in scaring the calf
so that it wouldn't drink, and scaring the sheep so that two jumped
out of the pen. We called Apa to feed the calf and took over watering
the garden, which meant hauling buckets of water out to water the
tomatoes. My poor family. They're gonna starve this winter because I
touched the plants. Just kidding. Hopefully they will dilute the power
of my black thumb. Back in January, I planted a flower. So did my
friend Heidi because she was here visiting. I had told my family about
my black thumb and Ata was determined to correct it, and show that I
could keep a plant alive. I think I even bragged a bit in this blog
about how it was flourishing. It is dead now. Not kidding. I watered
it the right amount, kept it in the right amount of sun, the whole
shebang. The flower that Heidi planted is doing great. Go figure.
Sorry. Random tangent. Anyways. After watering the garden, we named
the three kittens. Myshka (don't ask me what it means in Russia)
frances, and gato. You can guess which name I picked. Then my host
sisters and I tried to figure out a plan for our home-language club. I
want to learn Russian, but my pronunciation is horrible, not to
mention that there is this little thing called "will power" that I
apparently lack when I comes to learning languages, but if I teach
them English and they teach me Russian we will all push each other.
After that Aidana and I crocheted a bit. (I taught her bobbles) and
then Ata came in and wanted to talk which is my usual cue to leave.
Haha. So here I am sitting in my room and typing this blog to you
about my day. I still smell like cow, and my hands are super tired,
but it has been a great day and thought you all deserved to hear about
it.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

p.s. ONE MONTH FROM TODAY I LEAVE FOR AMERICA!

If you believe they put a man on the moon

I know that I have said this multiple times, but it never fails to
amuse me how similar some things are about human nature, regardless of
the country. My host sisters sigh when Ata changes the channel from
MTV to ESPN, and it cracks me up because it's just like when Jordan
and I watched TRL every afternoon after school and dad would come home
and want to watch the history channel or golf or the outdoor channel.
Haha The girls also put off their chores until the last minute, and
turn the TV off when they see a parent walking up to the house and
pretend to have been working diligently. I love my host sisters. My
Apa (whom I adore) is so great. My host dad's personality is too
exuberant for me sometimes and for everyone else, too. At dinner the
other day she said, "Jailoo, how many times are you going to say it?"
I could just read the "good grief" on her face. It was great. She also
has the mama eye. You know what I'm talking about. The look that makes
you quake in your seat because you know you're in for it if you don't
shape up fast. She gave it to Azeez this morning. She told him not to
open the china cabinet and he started to anyway. Then she gave him the
eye and said, "go ahead, open it." And he promptly climbed off the
stool. Love it. He will be four this year (on the fifth of august –
best birthday ever, in my opinion haha) and he's just like every other
spoiled four year old on the planet. He can be super adorable and then
make you wanna wring his neck in less than a minute. He leaves his
toys all over and several times a day you'll hear me or one of my
sisters yell "bleen" (it's like "durn" in Russian) because we've
stepped on a sharp toy. In the past day, I've stood on a car, a toy
whale, and numerous bottle caps (he is practicing chuko- the Kyrgyz
equivalent of marbles but usually played with sheep vertebrae).
Anyways, enough about the family.

I meant to go to the city and stay the night yesterday, but I didn't.
I went to the city to go to the bank and the getting there was so
frustrating it put me in a bad mood. For one, it was cloudy and gross
outside. I stood on the side of the road waiting for a taxi for about
half an hour. Under normal circumstances I would've just walked, but
it had rained so the road was super muddy and it looked like it would
rain again, so I waited. A taxi that was coming into the village and
dropping people off turned around and picked me up, so I climbed into
the back seat and waited. We drove about 200m and picked up the
Russian equivalent of our village's cat lady and then we waited. And
waited. And waited. And of course, about five cars drove past that I
could've hitched with if I hadn't already been sitting in a car.
Usually, I'm okay with the waiting. I've gotten a lot more patient.
But, I wanted to go to the bank before it closed, my Ipod was dead,
the taxi driver was too friendly, and the Russian lady smelled of
cats. And, it had started to rain. So, we finally left the village and
about 5km outside of the city…. The car breaks down. Not kidding.
After about five or ten minutes the driver gets it going again and we
get into the city. And then we stop to get gas. Gas prices have gone
up a bunch since the revolution. The lines are always super long
because so many of the gas stations have closed. Usually, drivers get
gas on the way OUT of the city. We finally got gas and got to the
center. Now, I'm sitting behind the driver in the back of a two door
car, and the Russian lady is sitting beside me with two big bags in
the floor at her feet. There's no one else in the car. We stop in the
center, and instead of the driver getting out, I'm made to climb over
the Russian lady and all her bags. And we all know that I'm not
exactly the most graceful person on the planet. The Russian lady
doesn't get out, or move her bags. She says, "astarozjna," which means
be careful. Thanks so much! Haha So, I practically fall out of the
car, and I hit my head on the door. What a way to arrive! Needless to
say, I was not in the best of moods at this point, so I just went to
the bank, and did some shopping then came back home. But don't worry.
Being in a bad mood is not code for sliding back into the "bad place."
About ten minutes after getting home, putting away my groceries and
putting on my comfy lounge clothes, my mood improved. Then I ate
strawberries, crocheted and talked to my family, and my mood was back
to normal.

The down side of not staying in the city was that I didn't get to have
my skype date with Ciara. So, I called her this morning and had a
lovely chat. What a great way to start a Saturday! She said something
that made me think, about how I won't take things for granted when I
come home. It's true. I have had an easier Peace Corps experience than
some other volunteers, and I really do appreciate what I have, but
there are definitely some things that I will relish when I come home.
For instance, I am really grateful that I get to have coffee in the
mornings. But I will really love not having to chew the grounds when I
have coffee that wasn't made in a p.o.s. coffee press. Haha I really
appreciate being able to do laundry, but I am super excited about the
prospect of dryer sheets and no static cling. I'm super grateful that
we have running water in our house (although some times it is faster
to walk to the pump and fill up a bucket and walk back because the
water pressures is so low), but I am really looking forward to being
able to wash my hair without having to use a bucket. I'm glad the
weather has warmed up, but I can't wait for my hot humid Virginia
summer. (Remind me of this if I have the nerve to complain about heat
when I'm home in July) I'm super excited to spend my summer on the
shores of beautiful Lake Issyk-Kul, but truthfully, I am really
looking forward to seeing my Lake Gaston.

I also talked to Mama, and chatted with Jordan and Dee for a bit on
Facebook. It's been a great day! Granted, it is only 9:30 and I
haven't actually done anything today, but still, the weather is
finally nice, I've got an R.E.M. playlist going, school is out, and
I've got the whole day ahead of me to do whatever I want. (within
reason, of course).
So, I think I'm gonna get to it.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

What a lovely day!

Yesterday and today have actually both been good. Yesterday was one of
the best lazy Sundays that I have had all year. I think I spent maybe
an hour out of bed all day. It was rainy, so I curled up under my
covers and read for most of the day. I took a "little nap" that turned
into a four-hour death nap! And, I didn't even wake up groggy like I
usually do. I crocheted a bit, watched a movie or two, and relaxed. I
needed a restful day. Today, I got up, had coffee, wrote I my journal,
did a pilates workout, cleaned my room, dusted, swept my floor, and
made a delicious egg, onion, and tomato bagel for lunch, Of course,
here, that means I had to make bagels first. MMM garlic and onion
bagels. I don't think I'll ever buy bagels again. They are so easy to
make at home, and taste better than store bought. Whew! I did all of
that and it is just now noon. I'm fixin to go so my laundry (and work
on my tan since I'll be doing it outside) I also might crochet a bit,
since I've got about four half-finished projects to wrap up before
coming home.

I didn't go to school today because tomorrow is the last day of
school, which means that there haven't been classes for the past two
school days because everyone has to prepare for tomorrow's holiday.
I'm really excited about it! (Truthfully, I'm just excited to be
excited about anything again) :-D

Later:
There's nothing like: forgetting that your cell phone AND Ipod are in
your pocket as you're hauling water and spilling all down your front
There's nothing like: the film that develops across the top of your
"clean" water because the bucket you're using to haul water is also
the same bucket used for milking the cows.
There's nothing like: a great, nasty spider falling from a tree into
your clean clothes
There's nothing like: defending yourself with a bucket from the crazy
angry goose that is chasing you
There's nothing like: your four year old brother reporting all of your
actions to your dad: "jess is adding soap," "jess is drinking water."
There's nothing like: getting to the very bottom of the liter of water
you're chugging and then noticing the stuff floating in it
There's nothing like: being lucky enough to have laundry day coincide
with banya day and having the ENTIRE family walk under your panties on
the way to the banya AND getting wood smoke to scent your clothes
In short, there is nothing like laundry day in Kyrgyzstan. Gotta love it!

(here's to hoping this laundry sunburn sinks into a tan)

Miss you tons
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

Helloooo Beautiful.

I am in a great mood! It has been a while, I know. Maybe it is the
fourth cup of coffee that I'm currently working toward, or my eighth
grade B class all earning fours on the test, or tomatoes being under
100som a kilo, or eggplant coming back in season, or the sunny
weather, or being able to wear skirts and open toed shoes and
t-shirts, or the awesome playlist I'm rocking out to, or maybe because
I haven't taken melatonin to sleep for almost a week. I think the side
effects of it were just too much for me. Depression or not sleeping? I
know which I'd choose. Maybe the combination of all these things is
responsible for my happy mood.

It has been a super rough couple of months, as I'm sure you all have
realized. But I think I am finally back to myself. It's taken a while,
with a lot of false starts, but I think this time it is for good. YAY!

Usually, when I haven't written for a while, I backtrack and try to
catch up on what has been going on, but really? Ew gross. Let's just
not. haha The now is so much better. I'm still working on my GRE prep,
but I'm going to try to avoid the "big words" in this blog. Haha (ly
jck) I realized that I'm taking the GRE's in July and that is coming
up super fast. I'm only SIX WEEKS away from my visit home! How
exciting is that!?!? I have to finish this week of school, and give
exams three days next week and then I'm done with school until
September. I wanted to do clubs, but exams go on until the 25th of
June and I'm leaving that day, so no clubs until I come back in
August. So. June, my dear, whatever shall I do with you? I'm going to
try to find a grant to get textbooks for next year, work on
presentations about Kyrgyzstan that I will do when I get home, and try
not to tire myself out too much going to the lake with my sisters. :-D

My plans to go to Osh to help Heidi with her camp got nixed. Going to
Osh for camps is now off limits due to the whole
"going-through-a-revolution" thing. I think I will do a bit more local
travel instead. I've traveled to all the oblasts already, so I think
I'll stick closer to home and maybe visit the new volunteers on day
trips. I think it'll be fun to go to other villages.

Well, I'm gonna go enjoy the pretty weather!
See you in six weeks!

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan!
Jess

More of the same

What a month it has been so far. And it is only the fifth day. In the
first three days, I hit my head on a low hanging pipe, a door frame,
and a shelf. Talk about a perpetual headache that won't abate.
Saturday, the first, was the Kyrgyz Labor day so there was no school.
And there is no school today because it is also a holiday. Also, the
9th is a holiday, so there is no school on the tenth. Classes end the
twenty-fifth, and then there is a month of exams. I only have to give
one exam during that entire month, but I can't do clubs or camps then
because the kids are still working. So, I need to find something
(other than going to the lake) to pass the time until the end of June.
I might try to write a grant to get textbooks for my school. I'm
already excited for next school year. I dropped the bomb on my ninth
graders that I am not going to teach them next year. They were pretty
upset. I really like my students, but the majority of the ninth
graders don't really want to learn, are loquacious, and don't pay
attention, so I feel like I could be more useful teaching the rising
fifth graders next year because they are really enthusiastic. When I
told them I wasn't going to teach them next year, they were all like,
"we'll do better, we'll study, we'll do our homework," but they've
been saying that all year, and they haven't really improved. I will
continue to conduct clubs, so the kids that really want extra English
practice can get it, but I'm working on eliminating my stressors, and
I think this might be a small improvement. Other stressors I can't
really do anything about, so I take what I can.

I sometimes feel as if some of the changes I've made here aren't
necessarily for the better always. I used to be a really nice person,
I've even been called "sweet" on occasion, but I think I have gotten
really rude here, by my personal standards. Examples? I am abstemious
when it comes to eating with my host family. I only eat dinner with
them. We've had this system for almost a year. My host sisters and
host mom are great about it. If they offer me tea, or food, and I say,
"no thanks," they let it go. Not my host dad. He is a really friendly
man, but his officious ways are really beginning to irk my nerves. He
will ask me to come drink tea, or eat, and I will politely decline,
but he continues to push. So, my options are to eat what he offers,
whether I want it or not (the problem with this is that my guileless
face shows my frustration and makes it awkward), or repeat my polite
refusal fifty-eleven times, or be laconic, say no thank you, and walk
away. My host dad has been at home, not working elsewhere for a while
now, and it seems like the whole house is tenser. He is so austere
with the girls. When he is absent, we talk and I sit with the family
and socialize, but when he is here, there is too much pressure and I
become reticent. He wants to turn every conversation into a lesson of
some sort, and it makes it hard to retain my equanimity, so I become
blunt in speech and it makes me feel rude. I also feel impolite when I
do my shopping or banking, or even when I get on marshrukas! I guess
I've integrated because when I do my shopping, I just ask the
salesperson how much something costs, even if they are occupied with
someone else, because if I don't I will never get service. Same at the
bank, I can be just as pushy as the ejes to get to the counter. I used
to wait politely, but the concept of orderly lines just isn't part of
the culture here.

All the holidays have caused me to have even more free time than I
used to. So, I've been filling up the time with GRE prep (notice the
pompous word usage so far haha), and antiquing (I found an antique
Sputnik III commemorative fountain pen, and I've been practicing
calligraphy), reading, and cooking. Jordan had to make a comment about
"having tacos at the parentals," so I decided to make them for myself.
Let me walk you through that process. It took two days! I had to soak
the beans overnight, then cook the beans, mash the beans, sauté
onions, and then make refried beans. I had to make tortilla shells by
hand, chop up all the vegetables to make salsa, and grate cheese. It
took forever! It is kinda nice though that basically everything I eat
here is organic, and tastes better than the easier, store bought
stuff.

I know some of you are still worried about me, and my post-breakdown
mental health, haha. I'm doing much better. Not great, but a lot
better. I haven't cried in days! unless you count Jordan sending me a
really sweet song that made me cry, and cutting up onions. Haha

My blogs have gotten less frequent and probably more random… because
life here hasn't really been super exciting. I supposed I've just
gotten used to it

Can't wait til July!
Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

My Dears, Darlings, and Loves:

You are all awesome. Just thought you should know. I know those of you
that I've talked to lately, and some of you that I haven't talked to
lately have been concerned about me. Rightfully so, I kinda had a
breakdown. And then another one haha. This past Monday and Tuesday
were probably the absolute worst days that I have had in country. The
whole situation has been very thought provoking, and
epiphany-inducing. I don't really wanna talk (write) about the
situation, because it is depressing, you probably won't understand,
and I've pseudo-moved on. But, I will give you a run down of why I'm
better now. I realized that even on the worst day of my life in
country, if my options were leaving, or staying, it was no question. I
am not ready to leave. Maybe it is the fact that I am an
anal-retentive OCD control freak who couldn't bear to mess up my
ten-year plan, maybe it is because I'm too stubborn to quit, or maybe
it is because I'm stronger than I thought I was… either way, not being
a volunteer is not even something that I wanted to contemplate. So,
(with a lot of help) I figured out that if I can't change the
situation, but I also can't deal with the situation, I guess the only
thing left to change is me, or the way I attempt to deal with the
situation. Recognizing that I'd rather be miserable for another year
than leave Kyrgyzstan made me understand that I can cope, and I'm in
the process of figuring out how. I'm sure I'm not out of the woods
just yet. I'll probably have a few more minor breakdowns before
equilibrium can be maintained, but I'm on an upward slope. As much as
I hate to use clichés, sometimes they are true. When you hit rock
bottom, there really is no where else to go but up. The going back up
part has been good. A combination of things have worked together to
improve my mood. I just got back to my village and instead of feeling
claustrophobic, I am at peace. It is refreshing. The weather has
finally gotten warmer, my girls club just started a big project, I
spent the weekend in the city, and it was so much fun. A recap: Friday
night we went out for pizza (there were about 15 of us, including the
visiting volunteers) and then we went dancing. It was a lot of low-key
fun. Volunteers sometimes tend to get stupid and reckless when we are
in big groups, but this weekend wasn't like that. I think everyone
just needed a get-together to blow off some steam. Pizza and dancing
are a really good remedy. Saturday, we went to the beach at the lake.
It was too cold for swimming, but a picnic, games, and jam sessions
passing the guitar around were great. (good grief, could we have
gotten more stereotypical PC/hippie? Haha) Being outside and warm was
so therapeutic. I got started on my farmers' tan, but managed not to
get too sunburned. Saturday night I hung out with Holo and watched
movies. This morning we had a brunch with everyone for Katie's
birthday before a lot of people headed back. I made my famous cinnamon
rolls, and we had eggs and home fries (the saleslady looked at me like
I was crazy when I asked for 40 eggs and 2kilos of potatoes), and
lemon poppy seed bread. Then I went meandering walk and had a picnic
in the park with Holo for a few hours before heading back. Good food
and good company and good weather do wonderful things for a person.
Also, I had several long emails (I'm working on responses- you know
who you are) and I dunno, I guess I finally feel good again. I'm not
naïve enough to think that the feeling will last indefinitely, but
when I hold on to feelings like this, it makes the dark ones not so
bad.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

Notes to self:

1. Find your glasses BEFORE you take out your contacts.
2. Telling yourself that the white chunks in your potato manti are onions and not fat does not magically turn them into onions and will not allow you repress your gag reflex.
3. You should’ve learned after Jordan’s wedding that volunteering to do any more than two heads of hair is a bad idea. Six 9th graders later- learn the lesson!
4. No matter how much you wish it to not be so, April in Kyrgyzstan is still going to be cold.
5. Mud is as slippery as ice, only when you fall on ice, you don’t have to change clothes.


Random Question
1. Why is it that when I lose weight, it always comes from the boobs first? Totally not fair.
2. Why is it that foods I didn’t really even like that much in America make me drool here just because I can’t have it? For example: caesar salad dressing.
3. What was I thinking letting my laundry pile up this far?
4. Why are farm animals so dumb?
5. Why do people assume I’m anything but American? English, Turkish, Russian, German, French, and Finnish have all been guessed.


About Prom:
Prom was great! One of my ninth graders told me it was the best night of her life haha. It was also her birthday, so I guess that is a good way to celebrate!
Teenagers are the same here as they are in America. The good things and the bad. I don’t really want to go into detail, just think back and remember your own prom, and the behavior of teenagers.
“The Way I Are” was an irritating song BEFORE I became an English teacher and before I heard it four times in one night.


That concludes the randomness of my thoughts for today.
Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

My Room

I have gotten a few inquiries about my room over the past few months, and I’m bored, so I thought I’d take a few minutes and describe it. I could just take a picture, but I decided to go for the thousand word option instead. Haha

Right now, I’m sitting in my bed, which is covered with pink flowery sheets, and a pink flowery blanket (I didn’t pick it out), my crocheted blanket, my snuggie, and Mr. Bear. At the foot of my bed on the floor are my water distiller, and my shoes. My bed faces the door, on which I have a bunch of pictures. To the left of the door is my L-shaped desk. Behind the desk is my only plug. Above the desk, on the wall, is every single card I’ve gotten in country. All my visitors love it. The next wall has my window, and a bunch of quotes. In the next corner is my wardrobe. Taped to the wardrobe are my Russian numbers, and hard Kyrgyz grammar reminders. Then I have my mirror/vanity/night stand right beside my bed. That makes the whole circle. Books are lined up on my desk, and under my vanity. My carpet is red. Other things in my room: my guitar, my rice cooker, my sleeping bag, my crochet bag, my space heater, and my bucket. On my walls, in addition to pictures, my map of Kyrgyzstan, cards, and language reminders, are quotes. They kinda make up my wallpaper and help to break up the monotony of sea-foam blue walls, they are all really cool quotes. Some are from a calendar Mama gave me, and others are just ones that I’ve found and like. They help to keep me upbeat when I get down, so I thought I’d share. If you don’t wanna read them, this would be the part where you can skip to the end.

You can have anything you want, if you want it badly enough. You can be anything you want to be, if you hold that desire with singleness of purpose.
-Abraham Lincoln

Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far they can go.
-T.S. Elliot

One cannot consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar.
-Helen Keller

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage- Anais Nin

Obstacles are those frightening things that become visible when we take our eyes off our goals .
–Henry Ford

Home is not where you live but where they understand you. –Christian Morgenstern

Sit as little as possible. Give no credence to any thought that was not born outdoors while moving freely. –Friedrich Nietzsche

Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones; and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake-Victor Hugo

When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.
-Theodore Roosevelt

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. –The Dalai Lama

Patience is the companion of wisdom- Saint Augustine

The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. –Allan K. Chalmers

You are not in charge of the universe. You are in charge of yourself. Arnold Bennett

Don’t be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated; you can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps. –Lloyd George

One half of knowing what you want is knowing what you must give up before you get it.- Sidney Howard

Make the most of yourself for that is all there is to you. –Ralph Waldo Emerson

Home is where there’s one to love us. – Charles Swain

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. – Jane Howard

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. - e.e. cummings

Don’t bother just to be better than your competitors or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself.
-William Faulkner

So much of growing up is an unbearable waiting. A constant longing for another time. Another season. – Sonia Sanchez

Love many things for therein lies the true strength and whosoever loves much anc and accomplish much, and what is done in love is well done. – Vincent van Gogh

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly. Langston Hughes

Keep true to the dreams of thy youth. – Friedrich von Schiller

For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. – Psalms 99:11

Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. – Helen Keller

For I know the plans I have for you declares the lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your hearth. – Jeremiah 29:11-13

I am still determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may be, for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our disposition, and not upon our circumstances. – Martha Washington

We are shaped and fashioned by what we love. – Goethe

Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. – James K. Barrie

Success is blocked by concentrating on it and planning for it. Success is shy- it won’t come out while you’re watching. – Tennessee Williams

How poor are they who have not patience. What wound did heal but by degrees. – Williams Shakespeare

Commit to the lord whatever you do and your plans will succeed. Proverbs 16:3.

The first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: decide what you want. – Ben Stein

Life is a succession of moments. To live each one is to succeed. – Corita Kent

You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach because you do not just live in a world; but a world lives in you. Frederick Buedner.

Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer, and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me, put it into practice and the God of peace will be with you. – Philippians 4:4-9

If a woman is sufficiently ambitious, determined, and gifted, there is practically nothing she can’t do. – Helen Lawrenson

In a full heart, there is room for everything, and in an empty heart, there is room for nothing. – Antonio Porchia

Life the life you have imagined. – Thoreau

An optimist is the human personification of spring. – Susan J. Bissonette.

Blessed is he who has regard for the weak, the lord delivers him in times of trouble. – Psalms 41:1

Disappointment, when it involves neither shame nor loss, is as good as success, for it supplies as many images to the mind and as many topics to the tongue. – Samuel Johnson

I also have all of Proverbs 31 written out, but it is really long, so if you don’t know it, I recommend you look it up.

That’s all. So, now you know what my room is like here.
Haha. Yeah, I’m bored. Deal with it.

Miss you tons,
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

My last blog was kinda odd, so: a post-facto-preface to it.

First of all, I want to apologize to anyone I've talked to in the past
few days because I know I must have sounded really bitter, jaded,
depressed, and angry. Most likely because I was bitter, jaded,
depressed, and angry. Haha. I'm feeling a bit better today, and since
I've been done with all my work stuff since noon, already went for a
jog and cleaned my room, I thought I would write a blog while I drink
my coffee and eat my rice. I don't know why I'm feeling better today.
Maybe it was the sixth crying fit, maybe it was getting more than
three hours of sleep (I was really bad and doubled my sleeping pill,
but I finally feel rested.), maybe my brain just maxed out its bad day
quota… who knows? Either way, the last week in Kyrgyzstan has been
rough for everyone. From the PCV perspective, the options have been a)
be isolated, lonely, and stressed with no news or b) be surrounded
with other people, have no alone time, and stressed with no news. Both
are equally bad. And the poor PC staff has had so much to deal with.
They have to take what little news we have gotten, try to make
decisions, and keep all 150+ volunteers from going completely insane.
I think they've been doing a great job. I think our safety and
security coordinator literally worked herself sick, and the medical
office has been working super hard, too, trying to keep morale up and
keeping us all up to date. Kudos to them. I started cracking up, and
maybe actually cracked, but I've been putting the pieces back
together. I took a medical approved "mental health day" and went to
the city because I'd been feeling so isolated while we were on stand
fast. It was great to talk to the other volunteers in person and
reassure myself that I wasn't going absolutely nutso. I've been
alternating between waterworks and being a zombie. (not the
"eat-your-face-horror-movie-zombie," the emotionally detached zombie.
haha) We went out for pizza and then Holo and I walked to get stuff to
make chocolate milk (comfort food). On the way back, I stepped in a
puddle. This sparked a half-hour long crying fit. Does that sound
like a mentally stable person? Haha. No. I internalized all my stress
from the past few months, and the uncertainty of the past week was
just my limit, so I blocked out the big stressors and cried over the
little stuff. Dr. Nazgul knew I was stressed as she's been calling to
keep me updated (and to check on me, I think) She asked me how I was
doing and I cried. Again. I think I've cried more in the past week
than I cried the entire year before coming here. I got back to my
village and talked to mama last night and bawled for half an hour.
Sheesh so many tears. But, today at least, I'm better. It seems like I
just wrote a blog about how I have to decide my mood. I swear, every
time I strengthen my resolve, it gets tested further. It really wears
on me. So, I've restrengthened my resolve and threw myself into school
stuff (like prom preparation) and have been trying to stay super busy
to stop myself from thinking too much. After talking to mama, I
realized that the things I usually do to stay busy aren't really
helpful right now. For example, I crochet, because it keeps my hands
busy and allows my mind to wander. My mind wandering is precisely what
I'm trying to avoid, so I've been devoting my energy to things that
keep my mind busier. And, since there are only so many pages of GRE
vocab definitions I can write before that too drives me crazy, I came
up with a brilliant idea to keep my mind occupied (taking my brain out
wasn't an option haha) The idea came to me while I was jogging and
listening to my ipod. I figured I would use my Ipod ESP and talk about
the past week using song lyrics. What? I know. Who thinks of stuff
like that? I think I've made enough allusions to my mental state of
late for you all to get that crazy people think of stuff like this.
So, that explains my last crazy blog.

Miss you tons
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

My Ipod has ESP

13 April 2010

These are all from songs that have popped up on my I tunes shuffle
today. The song might not really relate, but one or two of the lyrics
just popped out of the song. If you can tell me which song all of the
lyrics come from, you'll get a gold star. Haha

So the last week, at first I was all like, "I don't think that I can
take another empty moment; I don't think that I could fake another
hollow smile,"(1) I was all depressed and the weather seemed to be
reflecting the mood of the country, so I was all "Grey skies, clouding
up the things we used to see with wide eyes, maybe everything was
meant to be this way, will it ever change? Or are we stuck here on our
own?"(2) I got super frustrated was a cross between "We can close the
curtains; pretended like they're no world outside"(3) and "I thought
about leaving but I couldn't even get out of bed. I'm hanging cuz I
couldn't get a ride out of town, now anyone who really wanted me to be
down, come 'round."(4) It was not a good week for my mood. It was
kinda of "tomorrow you'll be thinking to yourself, where did it all go
wrong but the list goes on and on."(5)
Then the thought hit me that the world just goes on anyway, no matter
what you want, and I was very much "The storm maker says it ain't so
bad, the dream maker's gonna make you mad, the space man says
everybody look down, it's all in your mind."(6) and "You can't jump
the tracks, we're like cars on a cable, and life's like an hourglass
glued to the table."(7) with a bit of "got a pebble in my hand, and I
toss it out into the middle of the Rio Grande, but the river keeps
running, don't even know that I'm around, I could throw in a million
more and not slow it down."(8) thrown in. I went for a bunch of jogs
and walks to clear my head and was "we wanna walk a while, we know
that every mile brings us closer home"(9), and "I guess my feet know
where they want me to go, walking down a country road."(10) and
"bye-bye high life, feels like the right time to say so long, keep on
going strong and I'll just keep on being gone"(11) then I talked to
people and crossed between "shut up, I'm wrong, I know and we can't
talk about it."(12) and "I want someone to know me, maybe tell me who
I am"(13) because I couldn't really talk about it and was super
stressed. Then, I talked my friends here who were all "If there is a
load you have to bear, that you can't carry, I'm right up the road,
I'll carry your load if you just call me."(14) Now I now know that I
have to just let things carry on and try not to stress about the
little things that I can't control and "come on now, now, enjoy the
humour of the situation."(15) when it is just the little stuff. The
big stuff isn't humorous at all, but I can't let the little stuff
build up. I also have to get back in the groove because "You never do
the things you want, if you don't go and get a job" (16) I'm not back
to 100% just yet, I'm more of "I ain't happy, I'm feeling glad, I've
got sunshine in a bag. I'm useless but not for long, the future is
coming on."(17) So, I'm preparing for my prom because "when the world
doesn't make no sense and you're feeling just a little too tense,
gotta loosen up those chains and dance."(18) and Saturday will be "the
night when I go to all the parties down my street, I wash my hair and
kid myself I look real smooth"(19)

Hope you enjoyed the perks of my being crazy.
Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

What a Week!

I'm not really supposed to talk about what has been happening because
the PC has to stay unbiased. You all probably know just as much about
the situation here as I do because you get as much news as I did.
Truthfully, I don't know enough about what happened to make an
educated statement anyway. But, I can tell you what happened to me. I
went to school on Wednesday and right before my first class started, I
got a call from the PC telling me that there were riots in Talas and
that I should go home because we are on "standfast" and that I should
not leave my house until the Peace Corps called me back. So, I spent
Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and part of Saturday stuck in my house.
Saturday they called and said that I could leave my house, but was
restricted to my village. Then, yesterday, we got the "all clear"
which means I can go back to work and life has returned to normal. I
think the experience of the volunteers in Kyrgyzstan kinda reflect the
experience of the country as a whole. Some of the volunteers were
"consolidated," which means they all got grouped together. Some got
taken out of their sites, to a "safe, undisclosed" location, and some
(like me) just got stuck in our respective villages with little news
for a few days. Some of the city volunteers saw some of the protests
and some would have had no idea that anything was going on if we
hadn't read about it. Like in my village, for example, it was super
quiet and business as usual. I was always safe and literally, nothing
happened in my town. Plus, our TV is Russian satellite, so the news
coming in, I didn't understand anyway. I did talk to my Apa about it.
She is not particularly loquacious, but me being stuck at home sparked
some conversation. She told me (I'm pretty sure this isn't violating
any making biased statement rules, more of stating the facts) anyways,
Apa told me that a lot of people had problems with the president
because he put his family members in positions of power. Then she told
me that for Kyrgyz people, if you get a position of power, you are
expected to help out your family. If you have money, or influence, you
have to help out your family. So, Apa explained that it is hard to
balance. I can sort of understand it. If you act according to cultural
norms, you are a "bad president." (not my opinion, I have no opinion,
this a stating of apa's words) but if you ignore the cultural norms,
you're a "bad person" according to Kyrgyz traditions, because it is
shameful to not help your family. So, there you go. The government
changes sometimes don't really affect the little villages at all;
whether it is changes in school rules, or a complete government
change. Life goes on. So, the past few days, I: made delicious
chocolate chip cookies, washed my hair, worked on my GRE prep- I
learned some big words. haha, practiced my guitar, read a few books,
took a banya, made brownies, drank way too much coffee (thanks mama)
did crossword puzzles, gave myself a manicure, watched some movies.
(the new star trek was sweet), and made lists. Yes, I made lists. It
was really scary for a while. Not knowing what was going to happen
with the rest of my PC service. I did realize that I am not quite
ready to come home for good yet. For one, it would totally throw off
my ten year plan haha. So, being my typical OCD self. I made ten year
plan C (I already have an A and a B haha) I made a list of stuff to
take back to American in July, and stuff in want to bring from
American. I edited my bucket list (I've been able to cross a few
things off here), I made an ABCs of my experience in Kyrgyzstan (this
is my favorite list of the last few days, so I'm gonna share)
A- anitbiotics
B- banyas
C- cows
D- dogs (like packs of wild, crazy dogs)
E- elocution
F- fat. (the cure all)
G- grade books
H- honey (fresh honey is SO much better)
I- insomnia
J- "jazgul" (my kyrgyz name, it means "spring flower)
K- knitting
L- the lake
M- mountains
N- nature
O- oddball (a.k.a. me haha)
P- pumpkin manti, pumpkin oromo, pumpkin samsa… mmmm, and peanut butter
Q- questions
R- recluse
S- school
T- tea, or tushucks
U- units (for my phone)
V- vest (I'm crocheting one and it is taking FOREVER)
W- wool
X- (I'm omitting this letter. Seriously, stupid letter.)
Y -yurts
Z- zoo park (the one here is really depressing, just animals in small cages)

Haha, I know. I am a total dork. Anyways. I'm gonna attempt to do
something productive since I haven't in a while.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

Is it June yet?

I am beyond ready for a visit home. It has been a rough couple of
days. I did have a few realizations today, though. #1 I know that I
have matured and changed in a lot of ways. Some days it seems more
pronounced, and then there is today. I realized today that in some
ways I am exactly the same. Haha I had rough few days, so I gave
myself a manicure and bought two pairs of shoes. Typical Jess
Behavior. Shoe therapy hasn't changed I guess. Granted the shoes I
bought aren't shoes that I would have normally bought in America. (One
pair has rhinestones) But, they are both super cute, and I got a "wow"
from Aiculu. Haha
Realization #2: For me at least, being happy is a decision that I have
to make. I can be miserable or I can be happy. Even when life is not
all sunshine and roses, I know that I have control over my disposition
and mood. Living here has been a fantastic experience and I have to
remember it. The bad days are outnumbered by the good so I can't give
the bad days the control. I have had to force myself to remember that
sometimes bad things happen to good people. It is hard to fight the
pessimism and the desire to blame Kyrgyzstan when bad things happen
here, but it helps to remember that bad things happen everywhere and
my personal experience in Kyrgyzstan has been amazing and
overwhelmingly positive. I just have to focus on the good and make the
decision to be happy. For Example: A few days ago I got really
frustrated. We had guests coming and I was told I had to make sure my
room was clean so that our guests could "see how I live." I am not an
exhibit at a zoo or museum, in case you haven't noticed. At first it
never bothered me, but every single time we have guests, I'm expected
to play hostess/tour guide to my room. It is not a really big deal,
but just one of the little things that get really irritating after a
while. As a Peace Corps Volunteer, we're volunteers "24/7." And we
have to deal with "living in a fish bowl." I understand that
completely. I'm the foreigner and the extreme minority here, but I
guess I just felt that I shouldn't have to deal with all that nonsense
in my own home. So, I was dreading having guests and feeling kind of
resentful. Then, my host uncle made a joke that I should start
charging admission to see my room. It made me laugh because I guess he
knew how I felt about being on display, but the little joke was the
snap back into reality that I needed. I can be resentful and
irritated, or I can just go with the flow and see the humour of the
situation. I know that I will probably have the same realization
several more times in the next year but there you go. (Being honest,
this could just be that shoe shopping put me in a good mood. Haha)
Realization #3: I think I there is something wrong with me. I have a
really weird mind. Like ADD on crack with a side of crazy. An example:
I walked home from the intersection today because it was such a
beautiful day (bad idea that, carrying a month's worth of groceries
5km. I got blisters on my hand.) Anyways, as I was walking, I got
passed by a light blue dodge spirit. My thought process following that
moment: that looks like mama's old blue dodge spirit, which led to,
when we had that car; we lived in Louisburg, NC, which led to the
memory of Jordan backing Daddy's truck into the side of that house.
And then I laughed out loud, while walking down the road. This thought
chain took about .4 seconds. So I'm walking down the road cracking
myself up for no apparent, obvious reason. Does that sound like a
balanced person to you? Haha this happens all the time! I think this
is part of the reason that I have such a hard time keeping a straight
face and not smiling like we're told to do. I see something and it
reminds me of something completely random and unrelated and then I
smirk. I have a perpetual grin.

And now for something completely different: my random thought of the
past two days:
1. I think my Ipod has supernatural powers. It has ESP. I swear. I put
all 8G on shuffle and it played all songs that matched my mood today.
2. There is a reason that farm animals are farm animals.
3. Today I saw a chicken fight. A literal chicken fight.
4. Rice cakes and gummi bears = civilization.
5. I keep all my peanut butter jars and put rice and beans and stuff
in them so I don't have to have the bags. I am equally disgusted and
impressed by the amount of peanut butter I have consumed in one year
6. I now hate American TV. because it has turned into food porn.
Things that I never missed until I saw them on a TV. show or in a
movie. For example, I would do really really bad things for parmesan
cheese. Or an ICEE.. mmm

I think that is all for now.

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess (who still has a shoe addiction)

One Year Down, One More To Go

It is my second to last day of spring break and I was awoken this
morning at 7:30 by a call from Jordan, who somehow managed to get a
skype app on her blackberry (insert jealous fit here) and can now call
me via skype without having to be glued to her laptop. How awesome is
that? I heard through the grapevine that Aunt Pam and Nana commented
to Mama that I haven't blogged in a while, so I am going to remedy
that. Since I was up at 7:30 anyway, after I made my daily breakfast
of oatmeal, and actually put on pants and make up and made myself
presentable, I decided to go to school and try to grade some papers.
My counterpart and I need to plan for the fourth quarter, but she had
to take her son to Bishkek to the doctor for a few days and I do not
know when she will be back. I can not plan without her, but I can
grade papers. So, I went to school because Meerim (my counterpart)
told me that the teachers should be working this week. Nope. The
school was locked. So I walked around the village for a few minutes
and then came home, so I figured since I have nothing else to do I
will catch you up on the events of March. Prepare yourself. This is
most likely to be a long, rambling blog.

Before I begin, I have to make a few random comments:
-There is snow on the ground during spring break. Are you aware of the
irony? I never had a real spring break in high school because we
always had to make up for snow days, and now that I have a spring
break, it is snowy.
- I am working on learning Russian in my second year, but I think I
have a mental block. Russian always sounds angry to me.
- Surviving the winter has revamped all my senses. The feeling of
denim against my legs is a new experience. I know, I sound like I am
buckets full of crazy, but you trying wearing long underwear for
almost five months straight and then going without them. It is great!
- During my brief walk around the village this morning, I saw roads
for the first time since November. They were covered in snow for the
longest time, then mud when the snow melted. I am not deluding myself
that they will stay visible, but it has not rained or snowed for a few
days and the mud has begun to dry out in places, so- road!
- What is up with people naming big, ugly dogs "simba?" no offense
Kat, if you're reading this. I'm not talking about your dog. Haha
There are two big ugly barking dogs in my village and both are named
Simba.

Okay, I think that is all of the random comments for now.
Now I'll catch you up on all the fun stuff in March.
I left my village a little bit early for Spring Break, to go to the
FORUM conference in Karakol. FORUM is the English Language Teachers'
group and it is awesome. Katie, a university teacher volunteer helped
organize the event. My counterpart attended the event and I went to
help Katie. And by help, I mean that I took attendance and kept time.
But I got to sit in on some cool sessions and see how the English
Teachers in Kyrgyzstan are really attempting to improve their
methodology. Joy, one of my good friends, came up from the south with
her counterpart and taught a lesson. Some of the staff from the
Embassy helped with the event, and took all the volunteers out to
dinner. There is one place in the city with America food, so we had
pizza. They also brought Tostitos and Oreos! This coincided
beautifully because I got a package from Mama that just happened to
have guacamole in it! Joy and I made bean dip and had a regular chips
and dip feast! After the conference, we planned to travel to Talas
together to visit Taylor. We were planning on leaving Saturday, going
halfway, and then going the rest of the way on Sunday, but it snowed.
So we decided to wait and not travel on icy roads, which means that we
had to go from Karakol to Talas all in one day. I'm not sure if you've
seen a map of Kyrgyzstan lately, but they are on opposite sides of the
country. It is a long drive. We left early Sunday morning, and decided
to go by taxi instead of a marshruka, thinking that it would be
faster. The difference is about 150 som, but we splurged. It seems
that if I did not have bad luck, I'd have no luck at all. Haha just
kidding. It was too good to be true. We found a taxi with two seats,
for a reasonable price, and left almost immediately. No waiting. That
in and of itself is rare enough. But, we would happen to get the taxi
that had something wrong with it and couldn't go over 60km/hour… It
seemed to take forever to get to Bishkek. During the trip we had to
stop for a herd of sheep to cross the road, then cows, and horses, and
turkeys. Yes. A herd?/peck?/flock? of turkeys. The trip was like the
first line of a really bad joke. We finally got to the vauxhall (bus
station) and had to make our switch to get from Bishkek to Talas. I
think I have neglected to mention thus far that Sunday was Nooruz,
which is the Kyrgyz New Year. (Which is why we didn't want to travel
the whole way, everything is more expensive) We tried to find a taxi
with no luck, and then found a man with a mini van who wanted 800 som
a piece to take us to Talas! He was crazy on toast, and I told him so.
It is usually 350 som with a mini van. I figured we would have to pay
a bit more, but not that much more. So, we tried to take a marshruka
because they are normally 250, so we figured they'd be about 350. We
found a marshruka, but couldn't take it. There are two ways to get to
Talas, one through the mountains, and one through Kazakhstan. That's
right. We were going to the part of Kyrgyzstan so isolated that you
have to go through another country to get there. Haha But, we do not
have Kazakh visas, so we couldn't go with marshruka. The original mini
van driver knew we were in a fix, so we tried to bargain. We refused
to pay more than 600 and we wouldn't go below 650. But, he had a buddy
who would take us for 600. So we got to the other mini van and are the
first two to get in, which usually means that we would have to wait,
possibly for several hours to fill up. Luckily, we had a full van
within an hour. Unluckily, all the other passengers were men. Neither
Joy nor I wanted to ride in the middle, so we ended up in the very
back row with a little Kyrgyz man between us. The other guys were all
very friendly and chatty, but the man between us wouldn't speak to us.
We ended up leaving Bishkek around 4:30. We stopped on the outskirts
of Bishkek to pick up one of the guy's aunt. It made me feel a little
bit more comfortable having an eje with us. At this stop, they also
got the requisite bottle of vodka, and proceeded to toast the holiday
and each other. Joy and I both turned down drinks, but chatted quite
amicably. Joy is a university teacher and rarely has to use Kyrgyz,
but one of the guys knew a bit of English and they talked. I talked to
the guys and the eje. The guy between us, after a few shots of vodka
got positively chatty. The eje asked me, "don't you want to come be my
kalen?" I had not been asked that in a long time, probably because I
hadn't left my village for a long time and my villagers know the
answer. I laughed it off, but she brought it up again. So, I told her
that I would be a horrible kalen because I don't eat meat, don't want
kids, and can't cook. While all of that is not necessarily true, it
pretty much disqualifies me from being a good Kyrgyz wife. Haha One of
the guys showed us pictures of his wife and son. Then, not ten minutes
later asked me if I had a boyfriend. When I told him, "no," he said he
could be my boyfriend. I politely declined. We stopped for a break
about halfway through the mountains. I threw up. This means that I
have visited all of the oblasts in Kyrgyzstan and been sick in all but
one. Haha go me! We chatted with the other passengers all the way to
Talas, and they asked for our numbers. A lot of volunteers won't give
out their number, but I give mine to anyone that asks for it (within
reason) I like talking to people and if I don't recognize the number,
I just don't pick up. I do get a lot of heat sometimes for being to
open. Or "flirting" as one of my friends here calls it. I don't see it
that way. I'm just friendly and outgoing and can't not talk to people.
I still say "hello" back to people when they yell it at me. Most
volunteers ignore it. Anyways, even though we paid twice as much as we
should have for the ride, and were in a car for over twelve hours
straight, the trip from Bishkek to Talas was by far my favorite trip
in country. We got to Taylor's village about 9:30 or so and spent the
next few days doing nothing and hanging out. Alex came up from the
south, too. Heidi was supposed to come, but couldn't get a taxi. We
watched TV, swapped movies, made American food. We made lasagna, from
scratch. (Well we kind of cheated with the sauce; we had to sub tomato
paste because tomatoes are still really expensive.) I also made
bagels; they are getting to be my specialty, and burritos. I think I
probably gained five pounds in three days! Taylor kept apologizing for
us not doing anything, but it was exactly what I needed. A lot of
times when volunteers get together we have to be "doing something." It
was really great to just hang out, talk, eat good food, and not be
going nonstop. We left Talas on Wednesday to head back to Bishkek. Joy
had to pick up a form from the PC office, and I got a dentist
appointment because one of my teeth has been really sensitive and
hurting. We got into Bishkek in the afternoon, went by the PC office
for a few hours, chatted with the staff. I haven't been into Bishkek
since our training in November, so it was nice to see the PC staff and
go to an American café. The next morning Joy headed to the airport and
I headed to the dentist. I found out that my tooth had been hurting
because I lost a filling. Too many stones in my beans, I supposed. She
also told me that I had lost part of another filling and as a result,
got a cavity under the rest of the filling. Go figure. She refilled
the tooth that was hurting, but as the one with the partial filling
missing wasn't hurting, decided to wait until my mid service exam to
remove the entire filling and redo it. My exam should be right after I
get back from America. Lovely. Something to look forward to. After my
appointment, I went to my PST village for a visit. Apa wanted me to
stay the night, but I had been out of issky-kul for long enough and
wanted to come home. So, I managed to be in and out in less than two
hours. Miraculous. Every time I've gone from Chui Oblast back to
Issyk-kul, I've gone directly from Bishkek, but my village is in
between. It didn't make sense to go two hours out of the way, so I
tried my luck leaving from Tokmok, a good sized city the opposite
direction. There were no marshrukas going to Karakol and the big buses
did not leave til 8. We're not allowed to travel between oblasts at
night, so I took a taxi to Balikchy, and was the last person in, so we
left right away. In Balikchy, I found a marshruka to Karakol but there
were only three people so I figured I'd have to wait awhile. Nope.
With ten minutes, we were on our way. We stopped a lot on the way
picking up and dropping people off, and from about 45 minutes out of
Karakol, I was the only passenger. That has never happened before. The
driver was really nice, though and we chatted. He also dropped me off
close the apartment instead of the vauxhall so I wouldn't have to walk
alone at night. It was too late to get a taxi to my village, and I had
one of the city volunteer's keys that I needed to return, so I stayed
in the city. By some weird stroke of chance, I was the only volunteer
in the city. All the city volunteers were gone. I needed to return the
key, so I had to wait until the volunteer came back, which was not
until Saturday afternoon. I had almost two whole days of alone time. I
missed my village, but had been around people non-stop for such a long
time, it was really nice to have an "alone time" break. I left Sunday
morning (in the snow!) to come back to my village. I was hoping to
find a taxi directly here, and not just to the intersection because I
had a ton of stuff to carry. I got kind of lucky. There was only one
taxi, and the driver is my host uncle. I know his car, so I waited by
it because he was in the bazaar. There were a group of Kyrgyz men
waiting near by, and they were not entirely sober, but I was in a
crowded place and felt safe. Two police officers approached me, and
while I am not afraid of the police, being a foreigner requires a
healthy level of caution when dealing with police officers. I thought
they might ask for my id, because I so obviously stood out holding so
much stuff, but one of the guys spoke in English and asked me a few
questions, then told me I should be careful because the Kyrgyz guys
were drunk. Life is always full of surprises. The Kyrgyz guys were
talking to me, and I tried to ignore them because I don't like when
drunken people shout at me. I tried to pull the face that my country
director called a touch me and I'll kill you face, but I've never been
able to pull it off. Haha One of the men talking to me asked me if I
wanted to marry his son. I gave him the same excuses that I gave the
eje on the way to Talas. Usually that deters people, but this guy was
persistent. He told me that they could teach me to be a good Kyrgyz
wife and they could just take me. Bride kidnapping is not a funny
topic, but usually people are joking when they mention it. It is not
something that I find amusing or want to joke about but for the last
year, laughing it off has kind of been my defense mechanism to deal
with it. I just can't do it anymore, so I ignored the guy. Most of the
time, the drunk men I see are pretty harmless, and I didn't'
necessarily feel unsafe, more irritated. My inner voice (it sounds
eerily like mama) was just started to suggest that I think about
removing myself from the situation when the drive walked up. It
probably worked out for the best because otherwise I would have had to
wait at the intersection to my road and when we drove past, there were
two groups of men, and one group was doing vodka shots at the back of
the car. Now before you start to freak out that I'm unsafe or in
dangerous situations (yes, Aunt Pam, I'm talking to you haha) I'm not.
I normally feel very safe in my community and in Kyrgyzstan in
general. I just wanted to write about the way things are.

So, spring break. It was quite an adventure, went to Talas, and had my
one year anniversary, made bagels. Oh, and you are going to laugh, but
I also wrote a little song yesterday. It was my one year anniversary,
it was spring break, it was snowy, and I was bored. So sue me. I
thought it would be appropriate to go to the tune of the "12 Days of
Christmas." I was, truthfully, really, really bored. Haha

"The first year in the Peace Corps, Kyrgyzstan gave to me:
A house with an apple, apricot, and pear tree
2 lost fillings
3 crocheted blankets
4 weekly clubs
5 months of snow
6 oblast visits
7 antibiotics
8 falls on ice
9 Kyrgyz classes
10 host family members
11 summer salads
12 months of adventure"

I think it sums up my first year in Kyrgyzstan quite well. I still
can't believe that a whole year has gone by. If the next year goes by
as fast as the first, I will be home before you know it!

Miss you tons,
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

Unanswered Questions of The First Eleven Days of March.

How is it that the tape, which refuses to hold my map to the wall,
will hold the map to itself and make it impossible to unstuck?

What did I do differently in today's eight grade class that allowed
them to understand the simple present tense, when the last five
lessons didn't stick? Is the sixth try the charm?

Why is it that the days that I go to bed early, the power doesn't go
out, but the days that I want to stay up late, the power goes out
early?

Is the amount of eggs that I am eating in a desperate attempt to get
protein really gonna give me high cholesterol? (thanks mom for putting
that in my head)

Why do I never buy enough yarn, and why do they never have the same
shade twice in a row? (getting ¾ of the way through a project, only to
not have enough yarn to finish it and being unable to buy more of the
same color really sucks)

Why did I never like television until I came to Kyrgyzstan?
(seriously, psych? Burn notice? How I met your mother? – How did I not
know about these until I got to the middle of central asia?)

What is the Kyrgyz word for smart-alek? (I mean, I could do clever
donkey, but the effect just isn't the same.)

Why are the seasons messed up? Fall felt like spring, spring feels
like fall, and winter was just hell.

What happened to our geese? (I know the answer to that one- but I just
don't want to think about it. Except for that one really obnoxious
goose, I'm thrilled they ate him.)

Should I be worried about an eleven day sinus infection that won't go away?

That's all for now.
Miss you.
Love from Kyrgyz-finally-getting-warmer-stan
Jess

Happy International Women's Day

I thought it was time for me to write a blog. I have not written in a
while. My reasons haven't changed. Nothing exciting has happened. I
got to wash dishes today! Having four younger sisters usually means
that I don't get to help at all, but due to the frantic
getting-ready-to-go-guesting status of most of the family, I just did
it. And I managed to not mess up my manicure too much. Another reason
that I haven't written a blog in a while is that I've been sick. For a
solid week. Being sick in Kyrgyzstan is so inconvenient. I would
seriously do bad thing for a Walgreen's. I had a really bad sinus
infection with ear ache, sore throat and I think a touch of
bronchitis. I refused to call the PCMO because I didn't want to start
round eight of antibiotics. I missed a few days of school, but about a
quarter of my students were apparently out sick, too. and another
quarter were sick but came to school anyway. I had to endure a week of
listening to my host dad tell me that I got sick because I wore flats
to school one day. It couldn't possibly be due to the fact that kids
at school are sick, two of my host sisters are sick, and my immune
system has been completely destroyed. I has to be the shoes thing.
Then, this morning, Ata was sick, too. I couldn't resist and asked him
what shoes he had been wearing. He laughed at me, but I can't help it
and my smart-aleckness just pops out. I also had to endure a week of
turning down remedies and cures. I'm sorry, but I'd have to have one
foot in the grave and another on a banana peel before I consented to
rub sheep fat (or goose fat) on any body part. And I'm not rubbing
vodka on me anymore either. Did that once for a stomach ache and we
all know how that ended. (I think I blogged about how difficult it was
to clean sick off of sheets…) anyways enough about the being sick. I'm
feeling much better now. I still opted to turn down the invitation to
go guesting today (for the first time in eleven months) I didn't feel
like a) cramming in with 12 other people into a two door Lada b)
staying out until midnight when I have school tomorrow c) explaining
to forty more people why I'm not eating bread (giving bread up for
Lent has been really interesting) or d) turning down besh barmak.
Again. So I stayed home with three of my host sisters. As he was
walking out the door, Ata told me I was the kyrgyz equivalent of "in
charge" haha! My host sisters are great. It still occasionally strikes
me how similar teenage girls are here and in America. They watch MTV,
borrow each other's clothes, and put off doing chores until the
absolute last minute. Love it.

Being sick has allowed me to finish all the seasons I have of How I
Met Your Mother, reread Jane Eyre for the third time in country,
finish a crocheted market bag, and watch a ton of movies. And I mean a
TON of movies. Mostly they just turned into background noise the past
week, but still, I thought we'd play a little game. I'm going to give
a quote from ten of the movies I watched this week and see if you can
guess them all. If you can, you're awesome. If you can't you're still
awesome.
1. "anyway, you need people of intelligence on this sort of mission,
quest, thing."
2. "certainty of death, small chance of success.. What are we waiting for?"
3. "his son chico"
4. "you know what we need man? Some rope." "absolutely. what are you, insane?"
5. "I'll pistol whip the next guy who says shenanigans!"
6. "I can't believe I brought my real parents to our wedding."
7. "They refused to give me their names, but their ranks are nine
lieutenants, five captains, three majors, and one very fat colonel who
called me a 'cheeky fellow.'"
8. "I swear to god, if I even feel somebody behind me there is no
measure to how fast and how hard I will bring this fight to your
doorstep."
9. "We got a German here who wants to die for his country. Oblige him."
10. "This is hockey, there is no batter. Idiot."

I know, I'm super cool, right.
Oh! I can't believe I haven't written about this yet! I'm coming home!
Mom bought the ticket! I'll be back in the states from the 30th of
June to the 25th of July! Sweet!
We need to start making plans!

See you all very soon!
Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

If it snows again, I will probably cry.

I haven't written in a few days mostly due to the fact that nothing
has happened for a few days. Don't believe me? The most noticeable
things of the past week:
I got a package from home with starbucks Christmas blend coffee and
made a home made latte.
About half of my classes got cancelled or rearranged last week because
of our decathlon.
Yesterday was a holiday: "Defenders of the Fatherland Day," or "Man's Day."
I almost finished with the crocheted blanket for heidi—my second in country.
I cracked my host dad up by cheering for the US hockey team rather
enthusiastically.
The big news: It rained! This means that it is warm enough to not
snow. My roads are now slush, but I can deal with that.
And the main reason that I am writing today was because something
happened today. I caused an uproar at school How did I do this? I wore
shoes (flats) instead of boots. And I wore tights instead of thermals.
It wasn't a big uproar, but all the teachers asked me "aren't you
cold?" or "where are your boots?" "aren't you gonna get sick?" but my
favorite came from apa "Are you crazy?" haha Today is sunny and warm
(mind you that my descriptions of warm and cold are COMPLETELY
different from what they once were- by "warm" of course, I mean "I can
walk the 200M to the school without becoming a human ice cube on the
way.") I am not going to get sick from wearing flats instead of boots,
not when I'm outside for such a short period of time. And leaving the
house without thermals was amazing! I'd forgotten what that felt like.
Of course, being completely honest, the fact that the shoes in
question were red, might have contributed to the uproar a wee bit
since they are so noticeable. Yes, I bought red shoes in Kyrgyzstan.
They are my favorite pair that I have bought in country, and yes, that
implies that I have bought more than one pair of shoes here. shuddup.
I guess that the PC has not cured my shoe fetish haha.

That really is all that I have to say. I fear we might have reached
the point in my service where blogs become less frequent because
nothing exciting is happening. We shall see…

Miss you
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess

14 February 2010

Happy Valentine’s Day! – Jordan, you’ll have to call me or write me a long email about your weekend. I want to know how many times you and Kris fell down your first time snowboarding!

This is the “I had a slumber party, and it was awesome and I love everything” blog.
I realize that my last blog was quite miserable, almost humorously so. After I wrote it, I put on my pjs and watched Anastasia. I was feeling much better, and then my host sister came and got me and told me that the teachers at school needed me. So, I got dressed and went to school. There was a visiting delegation of directors from other schools and they wanted to see me. I went to school and saw them, and they complimented our classroom. The teachers and my director wanted me to sit and have tea with the visiting directors, but I was in no mood to be on display, thank you very much. So, I hung out in with the teachers who were serving tea. After the directors left, my teachers and I all had tea. We chatted for a bit, and then I came home. On the way home, I ran into a tree. I was walking with my head down, watching out for ice, since I had already fallen once that day and BAM… I walked right into a tree. I guess you could say that it, quite literally, knocked some sense into me. Haha I’ve been in a better mood since then.

I woke up this morning to one of sunniest, blue sky days we have had in quite some time; maybe that has something to do with my fantastic mood. The past few days have been considerably better. I guess I should go in chronological order starting with the slumber party from last week, skipping the bad days and finishing with this morning.

So.
The slumber party… was awesome. Granted it was very overwhelming with 15 girls descended on my house all at once. (I was thinking they would trickle in, but they all met up and came together) The 15 girls, plus my 4 host sisters, brother, apa, ata, counterpart, another teacher, and I made a big crowd. I have found that teenage girls are most resourceful and are best handled by being left to their own devices. Of course, here “their own devices” almost always ends up with a disco-tech, so our hall was turned into a dance party for a while and I was roped into re-teaching the cha-cha slide for the girls who were not at the last club. (shuddup Jordan) after which, the girls had a tea and cookie break. They all brought cookies, and I made about 10 dozen oatmeal cookies due to an error in our PC cookbook (I don’t want to go into detail because it makes me feel like an idiot. 6 cups of butter, honestly!) anyways. Teenager sure can eat! We had our tea break at around 7ish, so I decided to push the pizza dinner back until 9-9:30ish since it turned out that all the girls got permission to stay until the morning and no one had to leave early. I had intended on having all the girls help make pizza, but I reevaluated trying to avoid an anxiety attack on my part. 17 girls in our little kitchen would have been WAY too many. So I enlisted the help of the two 11th grade girls, my two youngest sisters and my counterpart and we made pizzas. I always end up making too much food when I cook for big groups (enchiladas in Norfolk as an example haha) and figured “hey! We can just have cold pizza for breakfast” – wrong. After we ate, I led a game of three round charades. I took a while to get the rules across –the second round where they could only say one word was particularly hard for most of them. And the third round they had to act out each other, me and my counterpart, along with every fruit and vegetable haha. (They weren’t very creative with the first time of picking words) Then we had another dance party, they girls played some games, and I got bullied (teenage girls are quite demanding haha) into reading tarot cards for every single girl (and my host dad haha) right after I started the power went out, so I read tarot cards by candlelight, which I thought added to the scene, although my use of two different dictionaries to translate the little book probably detracted from it. Tarot card reading, Uno, B.S, and Egyptian ratscrew carried us until about 2am. Then we put in “27 Dresses” on my computer for the girls to watch. Only about 5 girls made it through without falling asleep. The others said “we’re just gonna lay down, not sleep, until the power comes back on.” So from 3 to about 5:30 most of the girls slept. And of the course the ones that didn’t sleep were ruthless. Haha every girl that slept got drawn on with lipstick. I felt kinda bad ( I mean, it was my lipstick haha) but hey, girls will be girls, and who am I to detract from their fun. Especially if I’m being kept awake all night. And I’m sure a number of illicit calls to and from boys on friends’ cell phones occurred, but they were harmless. (I had to adamantly refuse about six boys at school the day before who begged to come) The power came back on at about 5:30 and we made friendship bracelets and listened to music until about seven, when we had tea again with the rest of the cookies (the left over pizza disappeared in the night.) and at 8ish when it got light outside, the girls went home. My two oldest sisters and I promptly passed out. I slept til noon and was the first to rise. All the feedback was positive and the girls have already asked when the next one will be. I told them “anan” which means “later” and gets me off the hook for some time.

Skipping over the ghastly next few days and jumping around: (I think I’ll just do this in bullets and say all the good stuff from the past few days and this morning)

-My oldest host sister has started eating around the meat in her food, something I am saved from doing because Apa does it for me. The resulting “discussion” reminded me so forcibly of the same conversation I had with my Mama in high school, when I did the same thing that it made me laugh and want to cry at the same time. (but in a good way)
-I agreed to chaperone the Valentine’s Day party yesterday so the kids could have it, and was forced to be on a jury for the contest. It was a lot of fun, even if I did freeze half to death.
-I finally figured out how to knit a week or so ago, and last night apa taught me the kyrgyz way of knitting. I’m gonna attempt a scarf once I finish crocheting the blanket for heidi.
-My youngest host sister turned down a trip to the city with my parents this morning so she could stay home and bake cookies with me. (I’m going to attempt apple tarts this afternoon. Wish me luck)
-I did my weekly change of thermals this morning and decided to not put any back on. So, for the first time since October, I’m not wearing thermals at the moment. And not because it is particularly warm, mind you, I just realized that I’d forgotten what it feels like to not wear them.
-Granted, after I went outside to do my weekly hang-up of my sheets, it took the better part of half and hour for my lower extremities to thaw out. It is sunny today, so I am going to pretend that my sheets are going to be clean when I bring them in. I haven’t been able to wash them in a while because I only have the one pair and it takes at least a week for anything to dry all the way on the line, so I make do with hanging them outside to air out and to beat the dust off of them once a week. It continually surprises me how much dust accumulates in my room. My window doesn’t open, so it is really hard to air out my room in the winter, and it seems like I dust my room every day. It isn’t surprising really, that I have a perpetually stuffy nose. I need a heap-filter. I’m rambling.
-My rice cooker has surpassed itself with awesomeness. I have made rice, beans, lentils, noodles, and oatmeal. Delish.
-I’m slowly (very slowly) learning to play the guitar. It has been difficult to find a downloadable pdf file for help. I’ve found ones that just cover reading music, and ones that have something to do with “tabs” but it is kinda hard to teach yourself with a book. It was the same with knitting. Jenn sent me that fantastic teach-yourself-to-knit-book, but it wasn’t until Holo showed me that I really got it. I think the guitar might be the same way. Luckily, a good number of the volunteers know how to play. I guess I’m what all my training books call a “tactile learner.” Haha
- I just realized that I’m on page three, so I think this qualifies as enough positive to make up for the negativity of the last blog.

Miss you!
Love from Kyrgyzstan,
Jess